I used to work as a phone solicitor. I don’t like phoning people I don’t know, it made me uncomfortable to pretend to be friendly and I detest asking them to purchase something I probably wouldn’t buy myself on a bet. For that reason alone, I am no longer a phone solicitor.

In point of fact, I don’t like using the phone at all and in some cases, that kept me from making some phone calls that I needed to make in order to get a task accomplished in genealogy.

I had to take a deep breath and plunge in. Make the calls to the people who didn’t even know who I was, because if we put it off, inevitably, people move away, or they pass away and we’ve lost our opportunity to visit with someone who may not have to look up the information that we need, but may simply be able to reach back into their memory and just reel it off.

The phone calls I had to make weren’t actually the much hated business cold call. While many of the people I wanted to telephone hadn’t a clue who I was, I knew, through genealogy, or relatives, who they were and what our relationship was, however, in many cases, that doesn’t help does it, if you’re trying to figure out the best way of calling someone up and having to say: “Hello, you don’t know me but I would very much like to ask you a lot of personal questions that are really none of my business, but which I hope you will answer.”

Granted thats oversimplification and in most cases, people are thrilled to help you with your research,but there have been one or two times when I got the “How do I know you are who you say you are?” response.
At which point, it’s necessary for you to reel off to THEM, what you know about your joint heritage to assure them you’re not a masher from the internet out to steal their good china.

In some cases, email will do it, in others you can send out a written questionaire, but in many cases, particularly with elderly relatives, they may not have email, they may be unable to respond to the written format and the only help for it is to dial the phone.
Prior to doing so, and yes this sounds silly, but write down what you’re going to ask.
Make notes for yourself and if you’re uncomfortable with the idea of phoning them to begin with, this will not only make you more at ease with the phone call, but help you to remember to ask all f the things you mean to ask during the call.
Additionally, several times I’ve made such calls, only to find myself embroiled in a pleasant conversation about the things they remember about my mother, or father as a child, found an avid support of my work in genealogy and hung up to realize that the chat was lovely but I missed asking half the questions.
MAKE NOTES!!

Have your questions ready by the phone, and yes making a list of what you want to ask is quite necessary. You may deviate from it, but use it as a guideline for yourself.

Take notes as you speak to the other person. Jot it down with a pen and as soon as the conversation is over, before its gone from your memory, jot it all down in a notebook or on the computer so its permanent.

Use comments or questions to job their memory.
Ask about any family member who might have documents or a family bible. Ask if anyone else in the family has done any genealogy research that you might compare your own with.

Does it Work? Yes it does. The telephone interview will offer you information that you probagbly aren’t going to get anywhere else, and the price is the momentary feeling of discomfort.
While interviewing in person is of course always preferable, sometimes its just not practical or possible.
Humans are our most perfect source of genealogical information, but they are unfortunately, more fragile even than the most fragile paper document.
My own father passed away in 1981, at just 50 years of age. His was the Native American side of the family, and it was his side which left me the most unaswered questions due to lives spent  on the reservation prior to his own.

I assumed that I would find the time to ask the questions I needed of his only brother, who had worked in the lumber camps of West Virginia prior to settling in Cumberland.

Did I put off the phone call or the visit. Yes I did.
Unfortunately I put it off a bit too long and in the end, was left with many unaswered questions that I’ve had to work long and hard to find the answers to from other avenues.

The moral of the story. Make the call.